Let me start by saying I hate running. In fact, hate may not be a strong enough word to describe how much I loathe the act of running. "Well, why did you run a half-marathon last year?" you ask. Well for one, I wanted to prove I could do it. Just because I hate something doesn't mean I'm going to let it own me. Also, I had to define and realize for myself just HOW MUCH I cannot stand running. Ok, now that we understand each other on this point I will say that running provides the almost perfect descriptive scenario for my life right now.
First, you're super excited because you signed up for a race (in this case, a school semester or other such commitment) you train, get organized, and pump yourself up for the task. Then the day of the race is here and you're on the starting line...BOOM it's time to go. You start off strong--and then you hit the wall. I'm on month two and the combination of work, obligations, school, and life in general has drained me of all my well-intended energy. The intricate dance of life-balancing started off so perfectly only to be reduced to a mish-mash of desperate attempts to remain abreast of deadlines and goals and plans. I'm on mile 6.5 and we still have a few hills to climb but my lungs are burning and my shins are screaming. I NEED REST. But I will continue to run...I'm stubborn like that.
In retrospect this is sort of what I signed up for. You may or may not know that I already have a few milestones marked off my list. (other than a half-marathon) I finished my first master's degree in December of 2010--a feat that I had promised I would complete before ever thinking about procreating. So what am I doing now?? Why all the moaning about life being like a marathon?? Well, I sort of made this huge life decision to go to seminary, acquire a master's in divinity, and take my chances at becoming a Wiccan chaplain. Woah. What? Yeah.
See, I love being in the Air Force. It's awesome. But I've never quite felt super excited about my job. (shocker) And, to top it off I have all this random knowledge rumbling around in my head about biological processes and international trade agreements and national security policies (hello free education!) but NOTHING related to my "job" in the Air Force. I put "job" in quotations because many would argue that officership and leadership is job number one whilst communications is job number two. However, I have this insane need to help people. I like talking to people, I like listening to people, and I like helping people. Oh, and I am a Wiccan in the military helping other Wiccans who don't have a chaplain. I'm making this a lighter post on the subject, but the more I learn and the longer I pursue this goal the more I realize how important this is--and just how much I could fail. See, others have failed before me. Others who have lost their careers in the pursuit of ensuring religious pluralism is upheld. I refuse to fail.
This is my marathon.
For lighter reading I ask those who may be interested to check out this article about one of my personal heros and our struggle: https://docs.google.com/open?id=0ByAY6igmY7VRd0pydUdKZ2ZGOFU
Bright Blessings,
Denora
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