I know I've ranted recently about the idea of self love and the need to cultivate it in our daily lives. It sounds like a really lovely idea too: "sorry I can't work those extra hours today, I need to go to yoga" or "no I will not bake an extra set of cookies for you, I deserve a pedicure..." the list goes on and on.
I had an interesting conversation with my aunt last night. The topic centered around the stresses we endure everyday (some realistic and some are self-induced). One of my biggest stressors as of late has been my decision to go to seminary school and my perhaps mistaken belief that my family thinks I'm crazy for doing it. What I didn't realize was how this belief colored the rest of what's going on in my life--without familial support for one of the biggest decisions of my life I've applied that stress in a way that translates to "I'm not good enough" and "they aren't proud of my accomplishments." This then distills itself into other areas of life like work, relationships, weight and body issues, etc. My aunt made a convincing point last night as well--she said people can only relate in terms of their own experiences. If you're talking to someone who's never had a drive to attend seminary school, can they really understand where you're coming from? In the end, who cares as long as you're happy? (this is admittedly sometimes harder to qualify, especially if family support is really important to you)
In my Vocation and Orientation class we're reading and speaking a lot about following our calling and living an authentic life. I asked the question last week about living a less-than-authentic life due to fear of societal pressures and lack of resources (i.e. money) I think that translates into other areas of our lives as well--"I need to weigh this much in order to be beautiful" and "I need to make this much money to be successful." In the end I think we need to give ourselves permission to not be perfect. I'm never going to please everyone in my life, but if I keep trying I'm never going to please me either.
You really are just where you need to be, just the way you are.
Blessings,
Denora
